Well I was in the middle of making a comment on a friends blog and decided instead of commenting on theirs that I'd blog about it on mine. Recently a friend blogged about feeling "old" partly because of the culture that they live in. My friend recently talked about feeling old because they were turning 23 and not married and no children. Well I know exactly how that feels because I was there. When I was turning 25 my friends joked that I was 25 turning 65. My younger self really wanted to be married and done having kids by the time I was 30. Well seeing as I'm 26 almost 27 and just married I doubt that will happen. But I'm grateful for how my life has turned out, and now can see my silliness!
Their experience reminded me of my own recent experience. My new experience kind of shocked me but I don't know why, it shouldn't have. But oh well. James and I went to our new ward on Sunday. We went to Sacrament meeting and Sunday School together. There was a nice woman that sat next to us in Sunday School. Sunday School is in the Relief Society room so James left to go to Priesthood. The woman and I started talking about how James and I had just moved into the ward and her and her husband had moved in about a month earlier and they came from Ohio. Anyway as time went on there was another woman who came and sat on the other side of the woman that was sitting next to me and they started talking about there children...lalala. I wasn't really paying attention to them, I was just really wishing church was over cause starting new things and not knowing any one gives me anxiety pretty bad. Anyway. The other girl left and right before the lesson started she turned back to me and we were small talking again. I think I said something about James' student teaching and then she asks, "Oh, do you have children?" I think a flood of emotion came to me and its a good thing I realized that she didn't know me, cause I kinda wanted to punch her...at church, right, anyway I just kinda smiled and said, "No, we just got married two weeks ago." I almost instantly felt like the only one in the room without any children (and probably was except the teacher, at least I wasn't the only one) and honestly no desire for them either. Don't worry I'm sure I will want them in the future...James hopes...but, man, weird. I think my teenage self would be pounding me for not wanting them but my current self is slightly more mature...I think.
In conclusion, life is full of weirdness and culture that makes you feel different things that might not necessarily be right for you. But the only thing that matters is that you do what you feel in your heart is truly the right thing for YOU!
